It was about 10 p.m. last night when I had a common human feeling: I was hungry. And lazy. So naturally I just wanted to order in.

I was over at a friend’s place and found the number to the neighborhood Dominos.

After waiting on hold for about five minutes, a human finally answered.

“Thanks for calling Dominos.” the lady’s voice said.

“Hi, I’d like delivery.”

“Phone number?” the lady asked.

“256-555-5555.” I responded.

The lady gave a slight sigh on her end and asked, “Do you have a different phone number?”

Confused by the question, I replied, “No.”

“I’m sorry sir. We don’t have a record of you as a customer.”

“Okay?” I wasn’t too worried at this point because they could just take down my information over the phone.

“Sir, we don’t deliver to customers after 8 p.m. unless they have done business with us in the past.”

The lady continued, “You can pick up your order if you wish sir.”

“No thanks.” I said hanging up the phone. My laziness was much to high to actually go out and pick up my pizza.

After hanging up with Dominos, I called a place called Donatos.

After absolutely no waiting time, someone answered, “Thank you for calling Donatos. Will this be for take out or delivery?”

“Delivery. By the way, do you have a stupid policy of not delivering to un-registered customers after 8 p.m.?”

The guy laughed, “No sir.”